I have a biological built in alarm clock in me that if I
need to wake up at a certain time, my body will automatically do it at said
time. This is only possible if I simultaneously think and feel about it before
falling asleep the night before. It’s not 100% perfect for I can tell whether
it will work or not simply by feeling it. When I’m not conscious enough, it’s
not going to happen and I am aware of this intuitively.
Last night before falling asleep, I already knew I was not
going to wake up on my own. I think failure happen when I am physically
exhausted. So this morning it was Fendi’s alarm that did the trick. Like a good
soldier, I quickly sprung from my feet the moment I heard the alarm, which made
my heart pound fast and hard. It’s shocking to be awaken from a loud noise.
After shower and getting dressed, I hugged my mother goodbye,
as she was to leave home to babysit her grandson. It was a pretty uneventful,
neutral, no tears and a get to the point kind of goodbye. True to my mother’s
style. She tells me she has breakfast for me and that I need to eat. I will
miss my food pusher. She feeds and nourishes me. That’s what mothers do. They
shove food down your throat and lots of it. When I’m at home, it annoys me at
times. When I’ll be in Tanzania, I will wish I was home again.
My brother came to the house to pick Fendi and I to drive us
to the airport. Since today was carmageddon, we needed to leave early to
prepare for a detour. To our pleasant surprise, no traffic and smooth journey.
When we arrived at LAX, they had breakfast and I had no appetite but just to
participate at the dining table, I had artificially flavored strawberry
yogurt.
The dreaded departure time was near for me. We walked back
to my terminal from the restaurant and before I was to ascend the escalator
into security for boarding, this is it…it’s time to say goodbye. My brother
said he’ll say goodbye first so we hugged each other tightly and kissed each
other’s cheeks and shared I love you.
When I turned to my daughter, I already saw that she had been crying for her
eyes were red and wet with tears streaming down her perfect facial skin. My
heart had been ripped into a million pieces at the moment of seeing and feeling
her sadness. Yet, deep inside me I was glad to see that she was emotional for
this meant that she loves me and will miss me. Like her mirror, I started to
cry and we embraced each other for some time, standing like two twisted trees.
Meanwhile, I was completely oblivious and disregarded discretion, as this was
an intimate act in public for all to witness. My face is touching Fendi’s face
and I repeatedly told her how much I love her and to remember all the things I
have told her recently. I continued to talk in her ears again reminding her how
much I love her, come visit me in Africa, take great care of herself and most
importantly not to forget the things I have taught her recently. I didn’t want to leave her body so I continue
repeating the same words. It was an emotionally charged bid of farewell. There
is no other way, anything less would be an anti climax. My heart is crushed and
I just hope that my brother is able to console her before she boards her plane
in 2 hours.
The first class seating in the aircraft enabled me to drink
champagne and wine in which I most likely ain’t gonna be getting any in
Tanzania so I enjoyed myself. It was inferior tasting but I still downed the
swig because I can.
A fantastic and delightful treat was having my cousin meet
me at the airport in Philadelphia. As I am wandering aimlessly around the
baggage claim area waiting for my belongings to appear, all of the sudden
before me appears my cousin who happily startled me! In great joy, I gave him a
hug worthy of years of not seeing each other. He is a very special cousin for
who I have great fondness. Cousin Steve never changes for he is always the
consummate doting and considerate gentleman. I apologized to him as my luggage
was so heavy and being the nicest guy in the world, he carried everything to
his vehicle where I saw his wife, Amanda. We walk towards each other and hugged
as if we were long lost sisters…so warm and loving was the feeling. In their
mini van, we excitedly caught up with our lives and they expressed to me their
admiration for what I’m about to do. I am
so happy to be talking to those who know the idea behind Peace Corps and
completely support and is inspired by such service.
When we arrived at my hotel, cousin Steve tells me they’ve
prepared some things for me and will give me a bigger duffel bag to carry what
my smaller duffel bag won’t be able to accommodate. Amanda has for me several
generous bags of Vietnamese coffee and some canned fish. How thoughtful. Food and a new and improved
duffel bag to boot! The additional weight is worth it. Food is going to be a
big commodity especially tasty coffee drink and savory canned fish. I check in
to my hotel and shortly, I meet 3 of my fellow Peace Corps volunteers. Super
nice and super sweet kids in their 20’s.
For couple hours, cousin Steve, his wife Amanda and I excitedly
talked about our kids, family, ourselves, and Peace Corps. I am trying to
convince them to visit Tanzania for their 20 years wedding anniversary. They
are sensitive and kind souls who would appreciate the simplicity and beauty
that Africa has to offer.
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