Thursday, May 2, 2013

My little friend died



21 April 2013


Today I was asking a friend about a certain gentleman whose lorry I will be riding to a nearby village to speak to the head master about teaching health topics to his secondary students.  I wanted to know how he was doing being that his son passed away 2 months ago from a sudden illness whose funeral I attended. It was a big event as the father and son were well respected as they have contributed much to their respective communities.

My friend told me that recently there was another funeral…another member of this gentleman’s family had passed away. Sad to learn that not only did he buried his son not long ago, but whom else did he have to bury again? I was told it was his granddaughter. My eyes widened and I gasped in disbelief, “Christa?!!?!?” My friend didn’t know the child’s name but I gave every description about Christa hoping my friend would adamantly respond “NO”. After confirming my answers, my heart sunk when I learned it was indeed she. Here is the story of how I met Christa.

One late afternoon after finished teaching, I was walking on the end of my street to go hunt for food as a friend told me that cabbages could be found in that direction in a shack store. If I don’t find food, then I really had not much to eat for dinner so I was on a mission not to starve that evening. As I am walking, I see no cabbages or really anything for sale at shack stores except tomatoes and onions. I continued walking and at the same time, I wanted to find and visit Pesa Mbili’s store. He is a “well known” old man who has a lorry where people pay him to take them into town to buy bulk sodas, dried goods and whatever mumbo jumbo they can sell back at our village. He has a timber production and a shack store selling petrol in addition so I’d venture to say he probably has money according to the villagers’ standard. I entered his store, not knowing it was the store I wanted to visit, and discovered there was nothing special but a lot of kangas for sale. I asked him, at the time not knowing he is Pesa Mbili, where I can buy cabbages as I was told there was some for sale in his area. He directed me to the house in front of his store. I thanked him but doubtful, because I saw nothing. I entered a house and a young man tells me there is no cabbage for sale. Frustrated and confused, I returned to the old man and asked again where these cabbages are. He took me to the same young man and we were told again that he had none to sell. This old man, feeling sorry for me and knowing that the white person has no farm to live off of, has a heart and asked his wife to go fetch me some pumpkin leaves. I was grateful for his kindness and I followed his wife and a young girl tagged along. As we walked together to their field, I am making chitchat. The young girl confidently said to me, “ If you want, you can speak English”. Surprised, I turned around to look down at the child. My thought was “why yes, my Swahili sucks ….and who are you?

It was right there and then I first took noticed of this young girl as I was speaking to her grandmother and hadn’t paid attention to her following us. So we began to talk and shortly I discovered it was her father who had died. With empathy, I told her my father passed away too when I was 12 years old just like her. Instantly, I saw her eyes light up and with delight, as there was comfort in her dark eyes suggesting that she is not alone. Certainly, it made her feel good to know a complete stranger, maybe a foreigner, could relate to her. We immediately bonded once we shared this common tragedy. We exchanged names and I will always remember her telling me that she liked my name, Wendy. What was remarkable about Christa was her maturity and strength. She was in my village to attend her father’s funeral, she was resilient and in a million years, one would never have guessed that this child just buried a parent. She spoke in a very matter-of-fact fashion and was wise beyond her 12 years of life. She spoke highly of her father and given that this kid had a very good command of the English language, her father did a wonderful job raising her, as he was the one who taught her English. The father had a good profession and understood the importance of education and speaking English well. I told Christa that her father must have been a good man and father. Christa revealed that she did see me at her father’s funeral. That is when I found out that her grandfather is Pesa Mbili.

I was impressed with this young girl’s confidence and knew she would go far in life if she chose to. I invited her to my home. Moreover, I think she needed a friend in this time of mourning. The next morning, 3 visitors woke me up from my sleep: Pesa Mbili, his grandson, and granddaughter, Christa. They briefly stopped inside my house to inform me that Christa will visit me alone in the afternoon after grandpa takes his grandkids to the next village to eat meat.

Mid afternoon, Christa came and coincidently another friend arrived at the same time for a visit. I was hoping to be alone with Christa because my friend does not speak English and for her to sit in our conversation may be boring …but whatever, welcome to my house everyone. When in Tanzania…karibu! As I am conversing with Christa, I discovered how ambitious she was. I dare say it’s not everyday in Tanzania I will meet a 12 years old girl who thinks of becoming a lawyer of international law. Her English was better than the teachers in my two primary schools or the secondary schools I’ve visited. I can totally imagine that her father must have been extremely proud of his daughter for she was a smart cookie who was articulate and precocious. I offered her every snack food that existed in my home ie little bags of popcorn and cookies and gave her whatever I could scrounge…box of new crayons and pens as souvenirs of our acquaintance.

We met again the next day because I rode in her grandfather’s lorry to go into town. I sat next to Christa in front of the lorry and as we stopped at the next village, I see a teenage girl who came unexpectedly to my home the week before. I called the girl over who was standing on the street. “Christa, ask this girl who she is and why she came to my house. I didn’t understand what she was saying to me when she came over.” I was not happy that this teenager who now sees me pretended not to know me. Christa translated my question and this teenager’s answers were totally illogical. I think she’s a mental case: a hungry 14 years old that knows a foreigner lives in the house and just wanted to check her out, the house out, and especially the kitchen out! Karibu, I guess…I did offer her popcorn as the beans I was cooking was not ready. She must have wanted food as she kept inquiring the whereabouts of my kitchen and asked couple times to see it and wanted to know what I was cooking.

That was the last I saw of Christa…arriving into town. I had even thought of inviting her to join me in my running of errands. I needed to go to bank, post office, and buy food…these chores are easier done alone and wouldn’t be terribly exciting for a kid so I never bothered asking. Although, why did she come into town? She knew I was going to ride the lorry and maybe this was her way to indirectly hang with me again? She would have to also run errands with the driver and my errands are more interesting than his…surely. At least she could practice speaking English with a foreigner, which may be somewhat fun for her.  I went my way and thought we would ride together again on our way back to my village. I knew she would be returning to her town in northern Tanzania in couple days. She missed a week of school to come to my village to bury her father who didn’t live in my village either. His body was transported from his town. When my plan changed that I didn’t take the lorry back into town, I missed the opportunity to see Christa again.

It is sad that Christa is no longer around…for I believe her family, friends, community and perhaps even Tanzania have lost a potentially shining star. I’m confident she would have been a successful person where she would be an inspiration to young women in Tanzania as gender equality is still not up to par.

Tomorrow I may or may not see Pesa Mbili. I truly don’t know what to say to this man. He has lost his son and granddaughter in a span of only 2 months.

The good die young.

Oh, you may be wondering what Christa died from. She suffered tuberculosis. Yes, it is amazing that we are in the 21st century and people can still die from this disease. Well, I am a Peace Corps Health Extension Worker stationed in Africa to teach health and prevention. I will dedicate my teaching of health topics to Christa…Rest in peace, little angel.

22 April 2013

This morning I boarded the lorry and soon shortly, Christa’s grandfather sat next to me. He was holding a little girl, his other granddaughter, I am assuming.  I asked him how he was and how was Christa…hoping he would either lie to me or tell me someone else died. His reply to me while giving me a big wide smile was “alikufa!” (She died) I looked into his eyes for a while to see if there was real happiness behind that wide grin or him pretending not to be sad just to appease me since he knew I was fond of his granddaughter. I saw peaceful acceptance. I asked him how. He spoke and what I took away from his explanation was that she missed her father too much.

Rest in Peace, little angel…you are now with your beloved father. 

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